Yes! Yes! Yes!

I have never orgasmed easily during intercourse. My best bet is direct stimulation when I’m on top. It’s great when it happens but it’s pretty rare.

I was at a sex toy party a while ago and bought this stuff the lady called “orgasm in a bottle.” I have had it for a while now but hadn’t used it … I never remembered to take it with me when I went to Tex’s. Well, last night I packed it (as well as my KY Intimates lube, since he lasts for fucking ever).

While he was in the restroom last night, I seized the chance to put this stuff on. It’s like a gel, I’d say; in case it was super fabulous, I didn’t want him to know about it right away, in case it offended his delicate male ego. Well, holy fuck. I came during sex — in the missionary position. WTH?! Umm has that ever happened in my LIFE? Doubtful. The sensitivity was amazing. A few more strokes in the same position and I probably would have had a second orgasm.

Best $39 I’ve spent in quite a while …

HNT: I’ve Been a Bad, Bad Girl …

And neglected my HNT duties for a while. Thankfully Lauren, bless her little whorish heart, has stepped up to the plate. A while back I bought a lovely corset top and thought this would be the perfect place to show it off!

Head on over to Osbasso’s for all of the HNT fun!

Who the Hell Did I Piss Off?

I was off work yestersday, so I posted an ad on Craigslist looking for a little fun. I started e-mailing with this one guy who was cute with a nice dick. I was all into making plans to see him when he asked when and where the “meating” would happen.

Yeah… that quickly doused any arousal.

I made up an excuse (after e-mailing Audrina going OMFG) and started looking elsewhere.

I’d e-mailed with another guy sporadically over the past few days and he was cute with a NICE dick, so we made plans to meet at 7:30pm. 7:30 came and went… and so did 8:30. Ask Audrina, I was getting PISSED. I finally got an e-mail from him saying he got stuck at work and asked if I was ready. I wanted to scream I’VE BEEN READY FOR A FUCKING HOUR AND A HALF, but refrained.

He never fucking showed.

I was watching the security camera in the lobby of my building and I saw one guy (who sorta looked like him… maybe) who had trouble with the callbox downstairs, so he turned around and left. I really don’t know if it was him or not — but I had given him my number in case there were any problems… so whatthefuckever. Ass.

After that disaster, I was e-mailing with yet another guy. He’s younger than I typically go for, but I thought what the hell. We traded several e-mails until he mentioned he’d never been with a BBW before. He wants to try it because he’s heard big girls like to suck cock and he prefers blow jobs over sex.

*crickets*

I give up. Seriously. I really don’t want to be some guy’s experimental lay.

I wonder who’s going to pop up in my inbox next.

Wow… Just Wow…

Because I haven’t seen Health Nut in like a month (making Lauren VERY pissy), I put a new ad up on Craigslist. After weeding through all the e-mails, I started chatting with this one guy. We seemed to hit it off pretty well and he was cute with a nice dick based on the pictures he went me. We made plans to meet tonight for coffee to see if we clicked as well in person as we did online.

Thank GOD this was a time when I wanted to meet in public instead of inviting him over to my place. Seriously.

I’m going to call him Mr. t. Why? Because apparently he was a transvestite for more than five years, but stopped because the hormones messed him up.

!!!

He told me when he normally looks at Craigslist, he browses the m4m or t4m section — but on that particular night, he decided to see what was in the w4m section.

To be honest, I really wasn’t attracted to him in person anyway, so this sealed the deal for me. We chatted for a few more minutes before I made my getaway.

I couldn’t call Audrina fast enough… but I did wait until I had pulled out of the Starbucks. Hell, I was formulating the conversation (and this blog post) as he and I were talking.

NEXT!

I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar …

It had been two long ass weeks in between sex sessions with Tex and I was getting a bit testy. Monday evening I was in the post office when he called; I let it go to VM and listened to the message a little bit later. (He tends to be on the chatty side.) Thank GAWD I wasn’t driving because I nearly dropped the phone. It wasn’t that he said a lot of filthy things … it was that I had never heard him use such language before. He asked me to come over before I went home after work and to not worry about cleaning up, because maybe after the things he wanted to do to me, I’d want to clean up then.
Then he told me that he wanted to stick his tongue deep in my pussy and make me come until I couldn’t come anymore. Sold!

But, first, I had to get my nails done. :p Apparently putting him off like that was the thing to do, because the man was like a caged tiger by the time I got to his place. He took the time to hang up my coat but told me that my panties would be thrown on the floor. Next thing I knew, I was on my back, on his bed, naked from the waist down, his face was between my thighs and his hands were on my breasts. Damn.

When he finally let me up, several orgasms later, I was exhausted. He, of course, was energized, and fucked me for more than 20 minutes. At the outset he said he hoped he didn’t come too soon … ummm yeah, not an issue. The sex was amazing, although my inner thigh muscles were sore the next day. LOL Afterwards, we cuddled and talked (awww, I know, lol) then I ended up on top of him.

Now, I’ve been trying to convince Lauren of the joys of woman-on-top sex and let me tell you, seeing his eyes roll back in his head was worth every millisecond of insecurity that I felt. I love the power of being on top and in charge, of seeing that slow satisfied smile on my partner’s face, of being stimulated inside and out. Sigh. Fantastic.

I was starting to worry that Tex was just a missionary man … next up will be doggy style. Although, then, I couldn’t ogle his hotness. Hmmm, decisions, decisions …

HNT: Lauren’s a Day Late

Audrina said she’d post this week, but got caught up in Thanksgiving with the family. I’ll go ahead and put one up. It’s a day late, but that’s okay.

Head to Osbasso’s for more HNT fun.

Happy Thanksgiving

The Prince is coming over this morning before I go to work.

You could say it’s a new way to define Thanksgiving stuffing.

The asshole stood me up. I’d better not fucking get any more text messages asking me to suck his cock.

Thank God I have plans to get laid Saturday. I’m still trying to come up with a name for him.

Lauren Needs to Get Laid… Soon

It’s been over two weeks since I’ve seen Health Nut and I’m getting kind of antsy… to the point where I’ve texted The Prince for a hook-up.

We haven’t been able to work anything out… yet.

Health Nut had better be able to come through soon — or Lauren will be getting what she needs from someone else.

HNT: Lauren’s Sneaky

I know I haven’t posted about my escapades in awhile. Health Nut and I have been seeing each other pretty regularly and I don’t really have a desire to find a different guy to fuck. It’s hard to believe that he and I have been seeing each other for almost a month already. Time really does fly when you’re having fun… and great sex.

Here’s my HNT this week. Because I’m evil, I like to sneak pictures to send Health Nut while I’m at work. He seems to enjoy it.

For all of the HNT fun, just head on over to Osbasso’s.

It Shouldn’t Be This Difficult …

So tonight, I’m trying to arrange a hook-up with Tex. He works on the weekends and I knew my chances were slim, but I sent him a text asking him to call me if he wanted company after work. The response? A smiley face. A god-damned smiley face. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?

I wanted to snap back with a snarky text but just didn’t reply at all. It could mean yes, it could mean no, it could mean “I’m busy.” Well, I do know what it means — it means that I’ve lost interest and am now crabby. Lol!

All I want is to get laid. It was a long, stressful week, and I’d like some male attention, you know? Doesn’t even have to be a sleepover. That’s his game, anyway. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice, but it’s not necessary. Sex is. Seriously.

Lauren was also trying to arrange a hook-up with Health Nut. He went to go play poker with the boys instead. Fucking seriously!!!!!